1. My character is not defined by my 'dis'abilities...
Are you a person with thoughts, feelings, and many talents, or are you just overweight, myopic (wear glasses), or klutzy (uncoordinated not good at sports)? Even thought I'm a differently-abled person I have thoughts, feelings, and the ability to teach so much.
2. My name is Andrew, not my brother Matthew...
Please don't compare me to my brother. I am a completely different person with different abilities just like anyone else. I will develop at the pace God created me to, not my brother. Just because my brother also has disabilities doesn't mean that I will follow his same development.
3. Please don't discriminate me because my abilities are different...
Allow me the same opportunities to enhance my development as my typical peers. Please don't judge me by my different abilities. Not only can I benefit from spending time with my typical peers, they can also learn so much from me. It's never too early to teach acceptance. Some adults are still having a hard time learning it. I deserve a chance before judging me. By not allowing me to participate you not only take the opportunity away from me, but others as well. Discrimination doesn't just hurt me and my family, it also hurts the community. Please don't take blessings away from others by not giving me the same opportunities as them.
4. My sensory perceptions are disordered...
This means the ordinary sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and touches or everyday life that you may not even notice can be downright painful for me. The very environment in which I have to live often seems hostile. I may appear withdrawn or belligerent to you, but I'm really just trying to defend myself.
5. Please remember to distinguish between won't (choose not to) and can't (I'm not able to)...
Language is difficult for me. It isn't that I don't listen, it's that I can't understand you.
6. Be patient with my limited communication ability...
It's hard for me to tell you what I need when I don't know the words to describe my feelings. I may be hungry, frustrated, frightened, or confused but right now those words are beyond by ability to express. Be alert for body language, withdrawal, agitation, or other signs that something is wrong.
7. I am visually oriented...
because language is so difficult for me. Show me how to do something rather than just telling me. And please be prepared to show me many times. Lots of patient repetition help me learn. I have already proven this to my parents, teachers, and therapists. Patience, patience, patience........
8. Please help me with social interactions...
It may look like I don't want to play with the other kids, but sometimes it's just I simply don't know how to. I need opportunities to spend time with my peers to help me develop socially. Please don't take these opportunities away from me.
9. Try to identify what triggers my meltdowns....
Meltdowns, tantrums, or whatever you want to call them are even more horrid for me than they are for you. They occur because one or more of my senses has gone into overload. If you can figure out why my meltdowns occur, they can be prevented.
10. Love me unconditionally....
especially if you are a family member. Banish thoughts like, "If he would just..." and "Why can't he..." You did not fulfill every last expectation your parents had for you and you wouldn't like being constantly reminded of it. Comments like, "He's no fun, because he doesn't do anything," should not be made when you haven't made an effort to get to know me. I don't deserve to be loved any less. I did not choose to be differently-abled from my peers. But remember that it is happening to me, not you. Without your support, my chances of a successful, self-reliant adulthood are slim. With your support and guidance, the possibilities are more than you might think. I promise you----I am worth it!
authors: Amy Oster and Ellen Notbohm
No comments:
Post a Comment